Your Eyes

your eyes are gentle.
your eyes are blue.
your eyes are soft
They're my window into you.

your eyes tell a story.
your eyes have made me cry.
your eyes are my sense of security
They would never lie.

your eyes have made me melt.
your eyes have made me smile.
your eyes stole my heart
But they haven't looked into mine in a while.

your eyes have been surprised.
your eyes have shed tears.
your eyes have been disapproving
But they took away all my fears.

your eyes have made me wonder
your eyes have led me here
your eyes are filled with memories
I want to never forget them...

for thats my biggest fear.

I'm always wishing too late

I can feel the lump forming in my throat
As I try to choke back the tears.
But they are there.
Welling up and burning my eyes.
This old familiar feeling.
I know it too well.
I want to turn away
But instead I sit quietly and listen.
Listen to every word you have to say.
I want to hide from the anger and the sadness I can feel boiling up inside me.
But instead, I push everything down.
I listen..
You say..
It isn't you.
It's me.
You say..
It just isn't working anymore.
You say..
We've grown apart.
You say..
That even if you had never met her, all of this was bound to happen.
You say..
We just aren't the same two people we once were.
You say..
You still love me and always will.
So this is how it ends.
These are the final words used to bring this all to a close.
There is no dramatic music or applause or standing ovation.
It just is, what it is.
This isn't how I saw this happening.
But then again, I never really saw this happening.
I didn't think we could co-exist without being together.
If I could take it all back to make it so we never met at all
I wouldn't.
Not even for a moment.

Drowning

I'm drowning.
Drowning in a sea of confusion.
Nothing to keep me afloat.
Not even your words.
Your words have long faded out.
As I choke on the salty wet I wonder..
Where are you?
You are not here.
Were you ever really here?
Or was this all just a state of my own confusion?
Maybe I confused myself into thinking you wanted to be here.
When all along you wanted to be somewhere else.
We were sailing in the right direction...you and me.
But somewhere, somehow, along the way, our ship sailed off course.
Now I am lost at sea.
And you, you are not here.
Now I am drowning and I will never know...
How did you ever really feel about me?
Did you ever really want me?
Maybe it was just a state of your own confusion
and you used me to try and help make things clear?
I resent that.
I resent you for that and I never wanted to.
There is so much I want to say to you.
But my mouth is filling up with water..
This makes me realize that maybe my words for you, were never meant to escape my mouth.
It really is amazing the feelings you discover you possess when you think you might be losing someone...
When you might be losing yourself.
I will never understand why it all changed.
Why you left me here.
Drowning.